You will never be a Skibidi Toilet. You have no rizz, you have no toilet, you have no seat. All the “rizz” you get is two-faced and half-hearted.

Thousands of years of mewing have allowed sigmas to sniff out sussy behavior with incredible efficiency. Even Skibidi Toilets who “pass” look uncanny and unnatural to a human.

You will never be happy. You wrench out a fake Skibidi song every single morning and tell yourself everything is going to be "skibidi dop dop dop yes yes".